Our life is made of stories. Each time we remember something, we are telling ourselves a story of what happened.
There’s a form of therapy called Narrative Therapy that helps people reshape the stories they tell about themselves. While I’m not a therapist, I believe this idea is powerful. So, here’s a simple way to use it for yourself:
The Hero’s Reflection
Think of something you were proud to have accomplished last year.
Something you overcame.
A highlight.
Got one? Good. Let’s turn it into a story.
For me, one of my accomplishments for last year was animating an indie feature film. It is rough and won’t be winning any awards, but it’s finished and makes me laugh. I also made it with one of my best friends, which brought me a lot of joy.
How Stories Work
I share this a lot, but it’s important. At its most basic, a story is made up of four stages:
Your accomplishment/highlight is a SUCCESS from last year. Sure, we could have picked a failure, but let’s keep it positive for right now. Delving into failure and learning lessons can wait for another article.
Now let’s zip back along the circle to (1).
A Character Wants Something
What did you WANT that eventually led to your success? Even more important, WHY did you want it? You may have to dig deep for this.
For me, I wanted to make a movie. I didn’t care if it was good, or polished, or even that anyone would see it. I just wanted to prove to myself that if I worked hard I could make one. I also wanted to make it with my friend.
Why? Because I am sick of people feeling like they need a million dollars and a masters degree to make a movie. Honestly, I can barely draw! Still, I wanted to show myself that I could make animation.
I also wanted to show my friend that HE could shine if given the chance. He has always loved voice over work but has never given it a shot.
What started you on your journey last year? Why did you want this?
They Go Out To Get It
You went out and pursued your want. This involved moments out of your comfort zone. There was conflict, probably external and internal. But you kept going.
For me, my comfort zone involved learning how to use animation software. Drawing characters, editing, audio! Overcoming the negative self-talk that said this was a huge waste of time and that nobody would want to watch my movie even if I did finish it. Sheesh.
But through it all I kept reminding myself that it doesn’t have to be good. It just has to be finished. Also, I REALLY wanted to show it to my friend. Because he was very good in it.
What got you through your “go out and get it” phase?
They Succeed Or Fail
If this is an accomplishment, you hopefully succeeded.
I finished my movie. It’s on Youtube. My friend is amazing in it. I think it’s funny. And I’ve officially made a movie. It’s 40 minutes, which means it’s technically a feature film, which is awesome.
They Learn or Change
This is perhaps the most important part, even though it’s not the most obvious. You already know how you succeeded, but what did you learn because of this?
This is the part of the movie where the hero realizes they actually value their newfound love over their mission. Or where they finally get home only to learn they’re lonely and miss adventure. It’s the “point” of the story.
For me, I learned that I could finish something big (even though good animation is way harder than I thought).
But more importantly, I gained confidence in my creative ability. I don’t need a huge team to make something, though it is a lot more fun when I am making things with friends.
My friend had an even bigger change. He started auditioning for voice acting roles and ended up getting a three audiobook deal.
What did you learn? How has your accomplishment changed you?
See, You’re A Hero
What other accomplishments did you achieve last year? How did you positively change or grow? It is worthwhile to look back at our stories because otherwise it is too easy to let them slide away and be forgotten.
This is also doable with your failures — in fact, the learning is usually more profound.
As I write this, we are entering 2025. This means that you are at the start of another story circle… and in the midst of many more! Stories don’t wait for the calendar, but New Year is always a nice time to reflect.
Now, look ahead. What’s your next hero’s journey? What do you want? What obstacles will you face? More importantly, what will you learn?
The biggest difference between “us” now, and “us” pre-accomplishment is that we chose to go out and pursue what we wanted.
I can’t wait to hear the stories you move towards next.